Match Report

Gareth's back from his latest trip abroad to thrill us with his latest match report:

Llanharan V Penarth 3rd Sept 2022

This was a huge win for the Dairymen. It is testimony to how far the club has come during the past 3 years. With 10 first team players missing, Llanharan fielded a team with 4 debutants, and still pulled off a win, against a big, well organized and well coached, Penarth team, who had obviously done their homework on us.

The game started with Llan dominating possession, mostly down to a superb performance in the lineout by Ieuan Evans, who despite displaying several chins acquired over the summer period, read the Penarth line out very effectively. Also the black and blues’ scrum was very effective and marched the away teams’ scrum backwards at every opportunity. This was due mainly to the outstanding work of sausage legs Dauncy, who is sporting the new fashion of “canckles”, combined with a backside the size of a small African country. Weighing in at a feather lite 20st, his prop partner Will Thomas was equally as dominant. However, all the possession was in the wrong end of the pitch and it was only a matter of time before the referee used his extensive knowledge of the laws, to penalize Llanharan . the penalty was converted to give Penarth a 3-0 lead.

The home side responded immediately, through the ever reliable boot of underwear model and top consumer of baby oil, Scott Jones.

With the score tied at 3-3 Penarth hacked at the ball, which ricocheted off several players. Then, with all the grace and speed of a world war 1 veteran, a player who shall remain anonymous did not manage to collect the ball. The end result was a score for the away side. 3-8. Back came Llan, roared on by Esther, whose dulcet tones became slightly ragged and desperate. Then came a play straight from the training ground. A crossfield kick by “right said Fred” from a penalty

Resulted in the outstanding Ryan Russell, collect the ball and dive over to give Llan a lead they would not lose.

HT Llanharan 10 – 8 Penarth

The second half saw the game become a turgid encounter, with both sides failing to go through multiple phases, and the referee’s whistle dominating play. There were several glimpses of what will, hopefully, be viewed more often, later in the season. The one moment of quality was Llanharan’s second try. After a break by Gollum, playing at scrum half, the precious was handed to Jack Thomson who used a combination of speed and strength to barrel himself over the line. This was again converted by Mr Tate and Lyle for the Dairymen to move the score along to 17 – 8. Several new players proved their worth on their competitive debut. Jack Walker was outstanding around the field and Morgan Parsons worked really hard. Morgan Parsons, in particular, has perfected the slack jawed, confused look, and we can only guess who is Pontyclun’s village idiot, when Morgan is playing rugby.

Jack Thomson ended with a man of the match performance, and despite only having a limited amount of pitch time, Lewis Cogbill has shown in training that he has the skill set to be a first team regular.

Andy Price reflecting on the armchair ride he has had while coaching at Llanharan stated – “Whoever wrote the match report last week should get a job helping insomniacs”

Kev Jones’ words of wisdom were “Smell me, I’m lush”

Derek Cashmore chipped in with “How long have I been team manager?”